Strife Specibus: Love Kind (An erotic Homestuck Fan Fiction)
by Jimble Jamble
Summary: Did you ever just want to see John get slammed by Future Dave? No? Well neither did I... BUT HERE YOU GO! You better set your strife specibus to hand jack kind and captchalogue some tissues, because this is a steamy story that you will never forget.


_**~Strife Specibus: "Love" Kind~**_

 ** _An erotic Homestuck Fan Fiction_**

John went out to get the mail, like normal. It was a sunny day and the air smelled of cakes... John looked and saw that there were multiple cakes in the windows of his house. John's dad must have left them out to cool. John went over and closed a few of the windows, John didn't want the cakes to get stolen. John then went back to the mailbox where he found a large package, which had his name on it. John took the package inside, it was heavy. "Hey dad? Did you order me something?" Asked John, but there was no answer. "Hello? Dad? Is this a prank? I bet this package is full of pies that will blow up in my face when I open the box". John set down the package and walked around the house, but he couldn't find his dad anywhere. "Huh, dad must be out at work or something." John stated. John went back and picked up the package, it being heavy as ever. John carried the package up the stairs and into his room.

John set the package down, next to his treasure chest, and decided that he would go onto Pesterchum, to pester some chums. He saw that he had a message.

\- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 17:08 -

TG: hey did you get your present

EB: you mean the big box?

TG: yeah your present

EB: it's not even my birthday

TG: oh shit

EB: what?

TG: it was supposed to get to you on your birthday

EB: why? what's inside it?

TG: sorry no time to explain

TG: ive got a shit baby of problems on the brain

TG: when a paradox hits or a mess up in time

TG: this shit gets so crazy im required to rhyme

EB: ...

TG: ...

EB: did you seriously just try and rap out your problem?

TG: yes

TG: yes i did

EB: ok dave, you do you.

\- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] -

TG: oh shit wait

TG: john

TG: dont open the present

TG: just wait for me to come and sort out this problem

\- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] -

John got off his computer, and went over to the present sitting on the floor. "Huh, why was this supposed to arrive on my birthday?" John asked. John went to go and get his dad's razor... to cut open the package of course. After John captchalogued the razor, he returned to his room. John began to cut open the box when he heard a noise on the inside. "H-hello?" John said worriedly. "Happy birthday John." Said a voice from inside the box. John froze. All of the sudden, future Dave burst out of the box. FD lunged at John, knocking him to the floor. FD then proceeded to rip off his own shirt. "Wh-what are y-you doing d-Dave?" John asked fearfully. John was sweating profusely as FD took off his shades. "I'm giving you a birthday you will never forget." FD said as he threw off his pants. FD grabbed John by the legs and pushed him into a downward dog position. FD then ripped off Johns white shirt like it was tissue paper... What a shitty shirt.

John trembled in fear, FD had just equipped his dick into his love kind strife specibus. "Are you ready John?" FD asked. "N-NO!" John replied... FD ignored him. FD then used his katana to cut off John's pants, leaving his body bare, like a pealed orange. FD went for John's mouth first. John tried to dodge, but was too scared to move. FD forced half of his dong down John's throat. John was choking, FD's dick was the size of Nick Cage's rabbit from Con Air. "How does it feel?" FD asked... John was unable to respond due to his full mouth. FD began to pull out, and John coughed. Before John was able to get a full breath, FD pushed his dick back in, going even deeper. John didn't think his throat would be able to handle any more of this thrusting. FD kept slamming. Each time, going deeper and deeper.

Eventually, Future Dave hit his limit, and was about to burst. "Shit, this is gonna be a big one John. I'll tell you now, after this I won't be gone. You need to know, that this has just begun. Here it is John, I'm gonna CUM!" FD exclaimed. John was too busy getting a huge load of semen down the throat to realize that Future Dave just made a shitty and dumb rap about how he was gonna keep raping John. FD slowly inched his dick out of John's throat, John proceeded to cough up some cum. Strangely, John thought it tasted like apple juice... Weirdo. "You ready for round two?" FD asked. "No! I'd rather drink Howie Mandel's piss!" John responded in an agitated tone. "Little monster was a shit movie and you know it!" FD shouted. "IT'S NOT THAT BAD I SWEAR!" John screamed. John had looked to where Future Dave was standing... But he was no longer there. Before John could realize what was happening, Future Dave had started prodding John's asshole.

"D-Dave? Don't do this!" John said in a panicked manner. Future Dave Laughed, and began to push. It didn't go in... "Damn, you have a tight asshole John." FD said in a surprised tone. FD pushed harder. "It's too big! It's not gonna fit!" John warned. FD laughed again and pushed even harder. The tip went in and John let out a large squeal. FD pushed in deeper and John moaned, FD kept pushing and John kept moaning. After 10 minutes of painful ass fucking, FD began going faster and faster. "Dave, NO!" John screamed. "Dave yes." FD replied. Dave went full force and got his entire erect penis in John's tight asshole. John let out a scream as loud as a meteor hitting the earth. FD pulled his dick out, John's asshole left oozing with cum. FD looked over to see tears coming out of John's eyes.

John them stood up, anger burning inside him. FD looked worried, John equipped something into his strife specibus. "W-what are you thinking man?" FD asked. John looked back at FD. "Round three..." John said ominously. John smacked FD to the ground, leaving his asshole as unprotected as an airplane full of convicts. "What the fuck!? Are you gonna stick a hammer in my ass?" Future Dave shouted fearfully. "The hammer... IS MY PENIS!" John shouted. John slammed his sledgehammer sized penis deep into FD asshole. "Holy fuck, I can feel it in my stomach!" FD cried out as John began to fuck him faster and faster. John was about to hit his limit and flood FD with cum, when he heard his door open. "Hey John? Did you... WHAT THE FUCK?!" Current Dave said as he walked in. With Future Dave flat on the floor and John on top of him, dick way deep in Future Dave's stomach, this was a lot to take in for Current Dave.

Future Dave twisted to see who was talking, rubbing John's dick just enough to give it that last push to climax. John released gallons of cum inside Future Dave's stomach, so much that some even came out of his mouth. "It's not what it looks like Dave!" John barked. Future Dave turned and looked at past Dave. "Oh shit! Paradox!" FD shouted as he began to fade away. FD vanished, leaving behind a massive puddle of cum in his place on the floor. "Fuck this shit I'm out!" Current Dave said as he walked out of John's room. John stood up. "Well, shit..." John stated. He decided that it was probably time to start cleaning up.

John took a long shower and mopped up his floor. He looked at his computer and saw that he had a few messages. He decided he would check them.

\- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 17:10 -

TT: John, what's in that big box?

TT: Hello?

TT: John, why is there a Dave in that box?

TT: John why is Dave removing his clothes!?

TT: Holy fuck.

TT: ...

TT: How could something that big fit in your throat!?

TT: What's he doing now.

TT: Oh...

TT: ...

TT: John?

TT: Are you ok?

TT: John what are you doing?

TT: ...

TT: I think I'll just go back to knitting.

TT: This is very weird.

\- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] -

\- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 17:56 -

EB: i'm so sorry you had to see that.

TT: John, Dave and I both are going to need some serious therapy.

\- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] -

EB: ...

EB: shit.

\- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] -

 **== THE END**


End file.
